Posted - 10/03/2003 : 10:27:35 You know you are a hockey fan if.....
1.Your idea of serving breakfast is giving each of your kids a fork and dropping an Eggo in the middle of the table.
2. You punish your kids with "minors," "majors," and "misconducts."
3. When you come to a traffic signal and the light turns green, you stop.
4. When you come to a traffic signal and the light turns red, you get really excited and start cheering.
5. You consider the Forum in Montreal a place of worship and you call a trip to the Hockey Hall of Fame a “pilgrimage”.
6. You keep a picture of the Stanley Cup in your wallet in front of the picture of your family.
7. Instead of duct tape, you use hockey tape to fix everything.
8. You think the Canadian National Anthem is the theme from "Hockey Night in Canada."
10. All your kids are either named Gordie, Bobby or Wayne.
11. You went into a bank because it advertised "Free Checking"....and walked out disappointed.
12. When someone refers to "The Classics," you think they're talking about the Original Six.
13. Your cure for everything is a couple extra-strength aspirin and a shot of Novocain.
14. You can pronounce anything in French, yet you have no idea what it means.
15. Every time you hear a siren you wonder who scored.
16. You can say "Khabibulin," "Tkachuk," "Jagr," and "Tverdovsky" without getting tongue-tied.
17. Every time you see the name "Roy" you automatically pronounce it "Wah."
18. Everything in your wardrobe is your team's colors.
19. You can name the “Broad Street Bullies”.
20. You refer to your team's enforcers as "chippy players" and you refer to other teams' enforcers as "cheap shots" and euphamisms for monkey poop.
21. When you're at a game, you're not bothered when your kid swears but when he says "shutout" before the game is over, you threaten to wash his mouth out with soap.
22. You wonder what Miroslav Satan did to become the Prince of Darkness and Ruler of Hell.
23. You think the proper way to spell the plural of "leaf" is "leafs."
